I woke up for the second time. This time, no one was there.

My cat had finally turned up though. The fat chunk of mass was nestled right in between my legs and my stomach, as my subconscious had always favored the fetal position. Then, I smelt something. Something really strong was coming from the kitchen. It smelt like my grandmas cooking, which was a strange thing to think about since she had been dead for 10 years.

I got up, petting my cat thanking for her return, and put on my robe. I walked into the kitchen expecting to see the 200 pound lady I had once known, and instead it was a more recent familiar face. Raleigh.

He was cooking bacon, which made me extremely happy, since I had bought the bacon for an extremely vulnerable day. Today was the most perfect day to whip out bacon. I was immediately moved by this act of giving. I wasn't surprised because of my current state, but something about a man cooking for me made me emotional.

"Oh, you're cooking."

He turned around quickly.

"Yeah, I thought you might be hungry. It's twelve o' clock."

"It is. Wow, I usually don't sleep this long."

"Me either."

He smiled.

"Maybe it's because of all of the heart to heart."

He smiled again.

"What do you want to do today?"

"I don't know."

"It's Christmas day. If you could do anything on Christmas day, what would it be?"

I thought about that question. I was never really sure about anything these days. Christmas was the day where I was suppose to be doing something, something meaningful. I thought about God, this was his day today after all. Jesus was the one everyone, well almost everyone, was celebrating. What do the people who don't believe in God do every Christmas? How could they ignore everyone else's impending beliefs, and the fact everyone is celebrating and taking a vacation? Do they spend the free time hating every one else, and gloat in the fact that they know better? I didn't know, I didn't really believe in anything. Sure I felt like there was something bigger, actually I knew there was something bigger. I also felt from time to time that someone was always watching me, maybe that was God. In some sense.

Then I thought about Daniel. I wondered what he was doing. I tried to banish the thought out of my head and not care, but I always couldn't help it. He had somehow in the four year time span weaseled himself into my thoughts. I wondered if he would ever escape.

I imagined that he was spending it alone, sitting at an empty table eating a microwavable turkey. I got a special pleasure out of these thoughts. But I knew better, he had an amazing family. That's one thing I envied about him. He had a family that was inseparable, a family that could trace their lineage back centuries. I couldn't trace mine back 70 years. They were loving, and loved me, once. Like he did.

Then it came to me. It's A Wonderful Life.

"I want to watch It's A Wonderful Life."

"Great! That's one of my favorites."

"Really?"

"Well yes and no."

-

An hour later, we were sitting on the couch watching George chase Marry into her rotten old house.

"I always hated George."

Raleigh said.

"He is such an idiot really. I mean he has no idea what he really has, a great wife, a family. He sells himself short his entire life by thinking he is worthless. Such a tragedy."

"That's one of the reasons why I hate and love it."

"Because it's a-

"Classic."

We both said it together at the same time, and laughed.

"I wish I existed back then. It must of been such an exciting time to be alive in the time when movies were fresh and real."

"Yeah, these really are the best ones."

"You must not watch the ones today."

"Yeah, I saw one recently, but it really just got me down. Why do you say that?"

"I just assumed, I guess."

He shrugged.

"How do you know so much about these movies anyway?"

"I'm a fan too."

"That's good."

The time of day was dwindling down, and the light was fading.

"Where are you staying Raleigh?"

"Some Hotel."

"Which one?"

"The Governor."

"What? That's like one of the nicest hotel's here."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah."

"It's really stingy to me. There is nothing I hate most than a nice hotel, and an empty room."

"Why are you here?"

"I want to be."

"That doesn't really answer my question."

"What do you want to know Molly?"

I wanted to know everything, everything about him. I couldn't bare to ask though, I wanted to hold onto what he had shared in our friendship. The not knowing made everything better.

"Nothing, I guess."

Before he could say anything a key in the lock began to jiggle. We both lurched our heads over to see Laurel rush into the house and throw her things down on the floor in a rage. I could see that she was crying.

"Laurel? Laurel, what's wrong? What are you doing here so early?"

She looked at me, and paused before the words came out of her mouth.

"It's over, all of it. The wedding. I can't handle it anymore."

"What are you talking about?"

Without seeing Raleigh, she rushed up to her bedroom. I looked back at Raleigh, and he just hit me a concerned smile.

"I better, uh, I better go up there."

I said.

"Ok, just let me know if you need me."

His concern still left me in a bamboozlement.

I walked up the stairs and entered her room slowly. She was lying on her bed, back against the bed frame staring into space. I sat down next to her, and looked into her wet eyes.

"Laurel, what happened?"

"Huh, look at me. Now I am just like you, or we are one in the same."

Her words hurt a little, but I knew she didn't mean harm.

"What are you talking about? Why is it over?"

"He doesn't want to marry me."

"What? That's crazy."

"You know his mom, she's never liked me, she's straight from hell, and now this."

It was true. Mark had an amazing family, but his mother was a pill. The rotten kind I would be scared to have as a distant relative, let alone a mother-in-law. Since Laurel started dating mark three years ago she had always put Laurel on the back burner, giving her sarcastic compliments, and treating her like shit, to be frank. She would schedule family occasions without her like she didn't exist. And now, with the wedding, she had recently pretended like Laurel was a saint. I had wondered what she had done this time.

"What happened?"

"They're getting a divorce Molly."
"Mark's parents?"
"Yes. His father wasn't there for dinner. His mother decided to announce right after the toast to our engagement."
"What did Mark do?"
"All hell broke loose. Mark started fighting with his mother, telling her how much of a Agathe she really is. Everyone left. He told me he couldn't handle it, he couldn't handle everything. He told me he couldn't get married anymore, and that he didn't see how he could with his parents splitting up. I don't know what to do Molly. I-"

I grabbed her and she landed in my lap crying soft tears.

"It's Okay. Everything will be okay."

Somehow, I believed my own words. They struck me like an oncoming truck without warning. Okay? How could it be so, with so much trouble, and so much heartbreak? How is one suppose to learn how to go about their daily lives again?

It will be okay.

Somehow, I knew it would, and it only had taken me this long to believe it.